Sunday, March 27, 2022

Justin Trudeau is Arranging his Exit


You and I look at Justin Trudeau and see an obvious imbecile. Be advised, however, this is not how he sees himself.

Even before he was elected to anything, Justin babbled on about being born into greatness by virtue of his parentage (discuss among yourselves), and this was cringeworthy enough. But the development of his absurd, messianic self-image since practically flinging himself onto the casket at the funeral of his official father has been embarrassing for us all.

A handy guideline is to suppose that whatever opinion normal people hold on pretty much anything, Justin’s is the exact opposite, and this includes his reflection in the mirror.

All of this is stated not merely as gratuitous insult of Canada’s most ridiculous Prime Minister (although there is that), but to propose that much of the analysis of the recent Liberal-NDP coalition deal misses the point.

Commentators are aghast at the idea of suffering under Justin until 2025, and this is perfectly understandable. A single day being governed by that lisping nincompoop is one too many. But if one considers the pact in the context of Justin’s child-like narcissism, a different narrative emerges.

Unlike you, Justin is a Man of Destiny, born on Christmas Day to lead a nation of benighted snow-monkeys to the carbon-neutral Promised Land. And he will be doggoned if he is going to let you, or anyone else, tell him what to do or when to leave the office that is his birthright.

One suspects that after trampling citizens with horses, confiscating bank accounts, and generally irritating everyone all these years, Justin is unlikely to win another national election. Yes, there will always be lunatics with food allergies and problem glasses who vote Liberal no matter what (I live amongst them, and can see some walking their hypoallergenic dogs whilst wearing masks in the snow as I type) but, as I have witnessed several times with my own beautiful eyes, blue like the sea after a storm, after two or three election wins, Liberal awfulness becomes too much and Canadians vote the other way.

Perhaps Liberal polling or qualitative analysis augurs this. Maybe Gerald Butts broke out the finger puppets to explain it to the Great Man himself. Whatever the case, Justin’s deal with the NDP is not about him staying, it’s about him leaving.

By ensuring the NDP will support him in all things – taking a de facto arrangement we all understood and making it de jure – Justin has secured for himself a graceful exit.

Graceful in his estimation, that is. To the rest of us, Justin’s departure will seem as unforced as when Michael Scott played Sarah McLachlan on his handheld tape recorder whilst swanning out of The Office.

Most important, Justin will not be humiliated, brought down by a no-confidence motion or, more the horror, rejected by the voters themselves. Remember, always, that Justin’s career is a personal passion play and we are the captive audience. It is as though we are at a school talent show and the doors have been locked so parents cannot leave after their own child has performed.

My guess is that Justin’s walk in the snow will come sooner than 2025, after which we will be subjected to a miserable but mercifully brief interregnum under Chrystia Freeland, a twitchy and bizarre woman clearly in need of an exorcist, whereupon the Liberals will be shellacked in the next election.

While I am talking through my toque, notwithstanding all the media ballyhoo, I suspect the Conservative leadership race is a foregone conclusion: Cometh the hour, cometh Pierre. I do not know Pierre Poilievre well, but his simple message seems precisely what normal people have been pining for. To wit, when he is elected, Canada will be the freest country in the world. As for those desperate to make this a horserace, I propose that the Conservatives did not go to the trouble of ousting one pasty, non-entity of a leader only to replace him with another (Jean Charest, call your office).

In any case, before Justin departs, he is still positioned to do a variety of damage. Apart from my own theory that the NDP deal facilitates Justin’s movie star exit, kayaking off into the sunset, it has been proposed by others that it enables him to accomplish something substantial before he goes.

Here, our contemplation turns dark and, if nothing else of this prose resonates with you, please take heed of this part. If, as I deeply fear, Justin intends to implement a Central Bank Digital Currency (CBDC), we must oppose it until each one of us lies choking in his own blood upon the snow.

Others have suggested Justin wants some national pharma program or, who knows, a law that French on cereal boxes in Vancouver must be even larger (“Now with more Accents Aigus!”) and all that can be undone by a saner government.

But if, as has been proposed by globalists aplenty, including the Blofelds at the World Economic Forum, Justin aims to replace dollars with a currency issued and controlled by the central bank, digitized and fully traceable, there is no going back.

Your money will not be your own, it will be issued from a single, government source, can be spent only on approved items, and can be frozen at will. We caught a glimpse of this when Justin, Freeland, et al. tracked and froze the accounts of Canadians who gave as little as 20 dollars to the truckers’ protests.

Did you note the relish with which they did this? And didn’t you think it odd how quickly they pivoted to Bitcoin, rolling out new rules for exchanges and wallets across the country?

Whether or not a Digital Currency is their plan between now and 2025, have you any doubt that these people would delight in such a system?

This is, as stated, the darkest scenario and I outline it here to add my voice to the many others warning against it. Of the foreseeable dangers before us, a Digital Currency is the one from which a free country cannot recover, and we must be vigilant.

To conclude where we began, however, and to light a candle rather than curse the darkness, the key is that Justin is leaving. Having him in our face until 2025 is the cap on our misery.

One expects that the human toll of being so despised will shorten the timeline. Justin was lambasted, to his face, by members of the European Parliament on his recent trip and I do not believe he was expecting that. Likewise, the condemnation of the Liberal-NDP deal from people of all political persuasions must have come as a surprise to Justin and his enablers. Reason being, statists and central planners such as they are not very good at anticipating how normal people think.

The most of which they are capable are awkward gestures in the direction of normal human behaviour. They are like someone speaking a language they have only learned phonetically. For this reason, they could not anticipate that Justin would become a laughingstock for traipsing around India like Peter Sellers in The Party.

So Justin will depart, on his terms as he understands them. He will not allow even the appearance that anyone else dictated or influenced his actions. This is why, even as open-air prisons like Australia and New Zealand remove their Covid restrictions, formerly free Canadians cannot board a plane, train, bus, or boat, or even leave or enter their own country unless they receive Justin’s decreed injections. To grant that liberty now, so soon after the Ottawa imbroglio, would give the impression that disobedient protesters made a difference.

“Beware an old man in a hurry” goes the maxim. As we keep a cautious eye on the calendar and Justin’s final actions, Canadians might adopt a similar adage: “Beware a spoiled brat crafting his exit.”

Theo Caldwell just wanted to be left alone. Contact him at

Saturday, February 19, 2022

Abolish Justin Trudeau

Ordinarily, when one inveighs against a Western political leader, the prose is filled with qualifications regarding established norms, liberal democracy, and the dignity of office. This is not that column.

Justin Trudeau must be removed from his position, prosecuted, and imprisoned, or else forced to flee to some country that will grant him asylum (Cuba, perhaps?). His legacy must be uprooted, the earth salted, and his children should feel compelled to change their name.

The same goes for Justin’s grotesque sidekick, cackling goblin Chrystia Freeland, who has evinced such twitchy, demonic delight in detailing the harms she will visit on citizens for their defiance, one expects she would make a fine Deputy Prime Minister of Hell itself.

This is not proposed out of anger – although there is that – but from a bone-deep understanding that justice must be done. If we, as Canadians, allow a leader to abuse our trust and persons as Trudeau has done, and permit those excesses to go unpunished, how can we, as a nation, go forward with dignity?

(Simpsons scholars will recall the zookeeper’s admonition when Ned Flanders fell into the baboon enclosure: “If they don't kill the intruder, it's really bad for their society.”)

Therefore, Justin and his minions, along with all that they represent, must be defenestrated through the Overton Window of acceptable conduct, without the benefit of it being open.

Faceless government stormtroopers advance upon peaceful, joyous protestors, running them down with police horses, bashing bodies and cracking skulls in the snow while, in climate-controlled offices, state enforcers and their impish aides in the press confiscate the savings and crush the livelihoods of ordinary people.

There are not two legitimate sides to this. There is right and there is wrong and now, no matter your politics before, you have no choice but to see it.

Some will choose evil, or at least refuse to acknowledge it. Justin, et al., for all their moral hideousness, are still human, as are those who support them. You may have such people in your life. Self-satisfied city-dwellers with hyphenated, made-up jobs are especially prone to justifying wickedness if it keeps them in comfort.

But what man intends for evil, God uses for good, and the events of the past few days – indeed, the past two years – have removed the veil of so much that is wrong.

It was troublesome enough when Justin was an embarrassing, feckless pusscake. As Ben Shapiro famously observed, “Justin Trudeau is what would happen if the song ‘Imagine’ took human form and then ate a Tide Pod.”

But many sensed that, beneath the yoga-posing, hair-shimmying vapidity, Justin is a bad joke with a dark side.

The Left always creates the world they want for people. Their plans always come to police batons, guns, horses and tanks, line-ups for food, despair and bleakness. Always.

Those of us who spent our lives on the “right” – an anachronistic and useless term that here denotes we who maintain traditional beliefs in basic normalcy – are inured to being unpersoned and labeled istophobes for defying, or even hesitating to celebrate, whatever collectivist cause was foisted upon us.

Others may have wondered why we went to the trouble, rather than just get with the program. It is because we realized that behind all the heart-hands and rainbows were the police batons, bank runs and food shortages.

One can know this from even a cursory reading of history, or by hearing it from the heart, if one chooses to listen.

God creates each one of us in perfect equilibrium between good and evil with the freedom, and responsibility, to choose. It is this capacity to discern that makes us human. At every turn, the Left seeks to remove that choice from us, thereby robbing us of our humanity.

We all shoulder some small part of society – on this, they and we agree – and no one else can carry it for us. Where our paths diverge, however, is the Left invariably decides there is One True Path that we all must follow, and it will be enforced.

Besides that this robs others of their human agency, it is also a lie. The human desire for power over others is perhaps our strongest instinct and, once indulged, it is insatiable. Rather than resist it, the Left makes it their god, and that – not some cuddly codswallop about the greater good – is their motivation.

If you seek some proof in this proximate crisis, consider that there has been precious little talk of health or covid or characterizing of the Ottawa protests as a “super-spreader” event since this began. Reason being, this is not about people’s welfare and never was. The only crime they condemn is disobedience.

It was inspiring to see protesters speaking of love and forgiveness to faceless police who would shortly run them down. Previous to that, the will and logistics that brought the Freedom Convoy together were a wonder to behold. These are people with character and skills, distinct from the puffy conformists who oppose them.

What clear-thinking person would not rather be governed by 300 truckers than the members of Canada’s parliament?

There was not a stitch of destruction or violence – indeed, Ottawa’s streets were safer than ever – until Justin moved in. Here were people protesting in peace, bravely calling upon the best within them to shoulder their portion of the world as they saw fit. Lest we forget, their principal request was to be left alone to do just that.

Here, the Left hastens to screech, “You can’t be left alone to harm others!” Once again, this is their tic to collectivize all things, to steer us onto the One True Path while abjuring those who stray. In this case, their professed, universal remedy is that all must receive injections and carry digital proof of compliance. But as always, that is only their excuse. Not even those who listen to CBC unironically can believe this is about health any longer.

We who saw our countrymen trampled in the snow must also see those responsible brought to justice. Formerly free people made to fear that their fortunes may be seized and their livelihoods destroyed must have those fears assuaged, and receive the true promise that they will be free again. Consequently, Justin and those who have enabled him must be held accountable, through a process more rigourous and thoroughgoing than any that has been brought to bear on any leader in our nation’s history.

People often shrug that the Left is never punished for their excesses. Case in point, consider the kindly treatment – kneeling included – of any number of leftist agitators; and these generally DO engage in the violence and destruction of which the Freedom Convoy was absurdly accused.

But not this time. No, this time it must be different. Because if we allow this to stand – besides that Justin has revealed himself to be a maple syrup Idi Amin without the cannibalism (watch this space) – we will be unworthy to look our children in the eyes again.

Theo Caldwell just wanted to be left alone. Contact him at